Well...I finally did it.

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

If you read my blog in a Reader, you know that I had a post at the beginning of June about quitting my job.  And I don't know how many of you ever travel over to read my real blog from there, but you'll see that the post is no longer there.  It was written in a time of frustration, and while everything I said remains true...it's probably best not to have that on the inter-webs.  Especially when I'm going to try and get back to blogging and using this as a platform for other jobs.

BUT.

You know how that entire post was about me finally going to grow some girlballs and quit because I was miserable?   Well...I DID IT!  I QUIT! I'M A FREE WOMAN! I'M SO INCREDIBLY STUPID FOR LEAVING A JOB IN THIS ECONOMIC TIME! WOOOOO!

Really, though: I spoke to my boss about leaving.  "Transitioning," if you will.  And I didn't necessarily quit; they were nice enough to offer having me stay on part-time.  So, July is my last month full-time with them, and starting in August I work there part-time.  Probably an as-needed basis.  So, that'll be nice to have some sort of meager income while I flounder about.

For the first week after I had made the decision (I talked to my boss June 30), I had serious graduation goggles.  The beginning of the month was kind of slow, which gave me the opportunity to catch up on a lot of things I'd been dragging on, and my boss wasn't ragging on me for the tiniest things and everything was going really...well.  Schedules were set, accounts were falling into place, clients weren't yelling at me...it was almost enough to make me doubt my decision.

And then that week was done, another began and now, more than ever, I am absolutely positive of my decision.  The last few weeks have been some of the worst of my entire duration at this job.  I don't know if the world collectively decided to come together to make my life a shithole, but it definitely felt like it.  Contracts were rolling in, phone calls started piling up, emails went unanswered, bids were sitting for a week, people were yelling at me, clients were upset with me...I literally walked out of my office mid-email for my lunch break because I couldn't take it anymore and just needed a breather.

And personal things started happening.  I was unhappy for a number of reasons, friends' lives were starting to spiral, tragedies happened, friendships were strained...it wasn't really a good time.  July is always a rough month because so much happens during it.  There's always events and family things and Comic-con (IT IS A BIG DEAL) and weddings and pretty much anything that can happen will in some form.  So combining all that together...well, life wasn't quite what I liked at the time.

I've had a few days to really evaluate just how dumb it is for me to have quit a job that wants me and needs me and will have me in a time where jobs in general don't exist.  And the conclusion is: this is the right choice.  I don't care for this position, which is not fair to me or the company I'm with.  I'm absolutely miserable a good 97% of the time, and I've gained the max amount of learning I really can without extending further.  And the more I'm here, the less I'm doing something that really matters to me.

Sometimes the stupidest decisions are the smartest thing to do.  (Right?)

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I'm fairly obsessed with penguins, Peanuts (the comic), and the TV show Friends. Parentheses may or may not be (over)used in this blog, and books will pretty much be the only thing I ever talk about because they are my One True Love.

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