The birds and the bees. Except no birds. And really nothing to do with that. So, just bees.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

I had this whole idea for this post to be about how I went into this big blue funk last week and couldn't find the will to do anything, and ended up moping around my house driving my poor family absolutely batty as I refused to talk about what was upsetting me, and how I eventually read through some things and found some items from my childhood that made me realize life really isn't in the shitter, it's just on a downhill and now I feel like it's on the uphill and I surely hope it remains as so.

But right before I started writing the post, I went to my window to open the blinds (sunlight is good!), and have since discovered that there is a goshdarnfriggin' bee hive on my house!

I'm sure by now we know of my spider phobia, but what I haven't talked about is my fear of bees.  I thought I was doing ok about them, since I have survived a bee sting (we think) and they are relatively harmless so long as you're not tossing rocks at them or some idiotic action of the sort.  But um...seeing a general cloud of bees swarming right in the corner outside of your window is not something I can remain calm about.  There are at least 15 bees buzzing around, and who the hell knows how many more since they're crawling into the crack of my house between the garage door wall and the roof.  So, obviously, the solution was to call my parents freaking out, then close my blinds because we all know how well "out of sight, out of mind" works.

Problem is, I can hear the bees hitting against my window as I'm typing, and even when I have music on, all I can hear is the tap tap tap and it's making my heart go pound pound pound and my nerves go shit shit shit.

This. is. not. ok.

---Well, there was an invisible 4 hour pause there in which my parents returned from work/errands and dad was a big brave man and took a can of Raid on those bees.  But um...let's just say there are for sure more than 15 bees.  And they may have made it into the garage.  A good lot of them are dead on our sidewalk now, but there is still an even bigger lot of them flying around.

What I'm really saying here is...I'm not leaving my house.  Ever.

...perhaps an exaggeration, especially since I have to take my brother to work tomorrow (hooray for brother's car being broken) and make a library trip.  But really, these bees are making me extremely uncomfortable and I keep getting chills when I think about watching them all swarm.  We are definitely calling pest control, and unfortunately the hive is probably inside the garage wall, resulting in needing to tear down the wall to remove it (apparently leaving a hive will either a] keep attracting bees or b] rot and ruin all the wood and moldings of the house...neither of which are preferable), so this is not going to be fun.

But I'm really more concerned about making the tapping stop.


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I'm fairly obsessed with penguins, Peanuts (the comic), and the TV show Friends. Parentheses may or may not be (over)used in this blog, and books will pretty much be the only thing I ever talk about because they are my One True Love.


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